Columbia Divorce and Family Law Blog

Some Illinois fans of the reality TV show "Southern Charm" may have heard that one of its former cast members, Thomas Ravenel, was detained in September on charges of assault and battery. His ex-girlfriend and TV co-star, Kathryn Dennis, responded on Oct. 26 by filing for a modification in their custody and visitation agreement. The two share custody of their children, a 4-year-old daughter and 3-year-old son.

Ravenel was detained on Sept. 25. Reportedly, his children's former nanny accused him of sexual assault, and a source says these charges are related to that. A woman he met on Tinder has also accused him of sexual assault. Through his lawyer, he has denied both charges.

Illinois residents may know that the breakup of Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt began over two years ago. However, the pair is just now focusing on creating a child custody agreement for their six children, who range in age from 10 to 16 years old. Custody evaluations were court ordered, and the doctor assigned to the task moved forward with starting the evaluation process on Oct. 12.

Jolie has reported on several occasions that she is "focused" on helping her children recover from the breakup that has been so often aired in the public spotlight. She is supportive of the children rebuilding healthy relationships with their father. However, because Pitt has not significantly supported his children financially since the separation started, Jolie is working with her new divorce attorney to petition the court to set up a formal child support order.

Some Illinois single mothers may be confused about how child custody laws assigning parental responsibilities and parenting time relate to their experiences. This is especially true when the father is unknown, is not listed on the birth certificate or does not want to play an active role in the child's life. Forty percent of all children across the country are born to parents who are not married, up from 18 percent in 2007. Of course, many unmarried parents are in committed relationships or both involved in their children's lives.

However, if the father of a child is not in the picture, a single mother may not know if she has to file for custody and officially seek the assignment of parental responsibilities. Some may worry that by filing for child custody to be established in their names, a formerly absent father may suddenly reappear, even if he has previously shown no interest in the child. When the parents of the child were never married and the father never established legal paternity, there is no presumption of paternity. However, if the father of the child comes forward, proves paternity and seeks parenting time or shared parental responsibilities, he has a right to make his case to the court.

Divorced mothers and fathers in Illinois may find themselves dealing with the troubling problem of parental alienation. This happens when a child is encouraged to turn away from one of his or her parents in an extreme or radical way. While this type of alienation can happen between parents who are still together, it is far more common in divorced families. Either parent, whether or not he or she has the majority of parental responsibilities, could be responsible for interfering with the child's bond with the other parent.

When Illinois judges deal with child custody issues, they assign "parental responsibilities" to emphasize both parents' roles. However, where the child lives is not the key factor in parental alienation. Furthermore, the effects go beyond what is common for normal life transitions like puberty. A child may begin to exclude his or her parents from life events or request that one parent no longer attend parent/teacher conferences, school events and school meetings. In fact, that parent could be removed as a contact with the school administration.